Saturday, March 8, 2014

Quibble

Quibble

We quibble over everything
to the point that I fall apart
and nothing gets decided
yet the clock hands race and
we must come to agreement
time is money, big money

Conversing, you are as abusive
as when I went crashing into
bone breaking oblivion sailing
past my feet scrambling for stasis
landing in hospital for surgery
plate and thirteen screws in my arm

You beg me to let you come home
you tell me you are different
now that you are on medication
but you don’t sound different
you sound forceful and it is as always
all about you

You plead but you are you and I am done
You ask me to discharge you to die
you would never kill yourself but I won’t
risk that and so the phone calls go on 
and now I won’t answer for I can’t take
abuse piled upon abuse as I sit here hurt

Sit here hurting and hurting and hurting
and you can only talk about your frustration
because you aren’t living in your lovely home
with your lovely wife that you so adore and
you didn’t mean to break my humerus, surgery
months of PT and loss of full range of motion




7 comments:

  1. Willow, please be strong!! Don't relent and let him come home. I support you not taking the phone calls. You have taken enough abuse & don't need more!

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  2. Willow, I absolutely echo Mary's plea that you stay strong and don't let him come home. Your poem speaks truth. Read it when you waver in resolution. I so respect you for not taking his calls, anymore, hard as that may be. You are right when you write that you need to be done with him and his abuse. I'm sad you have been so hurt on so many levels and pray you time to heal unaused.

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  3. Heartbreaking, Diane. My heart goes out to you. I really can't even imagine being in that situation with Bill, but you are proof it could happen to anyone, all I can do now is pray, especially that you stay strong and take care of yourself. Love and hugs to you.

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  4. Not answering the phone calls and avoiding contact is probably the best thing you can do. People who have the gift of gab certainly know how to manipulate and make the other feel guilty. This reversal of situations is unhealthy and making sure it does not happen can only help you move forward.

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  5. Diane I have missed you and am so sad to read what is still going on for you. I wish you strength in keeping to your decisions and coming to terms with the situation as it continues. As ever you are a talented writer and I hope to read more from you. Hugs and hugs.

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  6. Diane, your poem is so strong and so heartbreakingly true. You are doing the right thing by not letting him come home, and leave those phones unanswered. I echo everyone else in saying do not, absolutely do not let him come home. Regardless of his intentions to be "good" he is not in control of himself and never will be. Stay safe, take time in healing body and soul, and know that so many love you and are in your corner.

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  7. Good liars can convince you on anything, but look at you standing your ground.. good for you

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