Change

“Hey buddy can you spare a dime?”

How and when to change, and why?

Then change gets thrust in your face!

Everything becomes upside down.

Change is about growing, but it could

become the hardest thing you ever do!

Forced into change I have grown up.

Always “the little woman” I am an adult

in charge of way more than I ever knew.

I am good in my new role doing it all.

The hardest part is his misery living in

a facility.

In desperation he only wants to come home.

I tell him we are working on that, though all

who deal with him as professionals say, “No!”

It is a sad and painful journey with guilt

abounding and my sense of responsibility

weighing as I try to keep strong for both of us.

He cries, he begs, he promises he will quash

his violent outbursts and never hit me again,

never knock me down, never break another 

bone, but he threatened to run me through

with a knife that put him back in a facility

once again crying and begging for release.